“No,” she chuckles gently. “I established our connection.” I reside within your thoughts. I would like you to replicate this process with me and establish a fresh relationship.
“In what manner?” I enquire, more apprehensive about causing her distress as I recall my several unsuccessful endeavours with Melina. She would go into a catatonic state for hours following my deliberate attempts to penetrate her thoughts. I could not subject the Queen to such an experience.
The Queen remains silent for a minute, leading me to worry she has severed our connection and anticipates my initiation. However, she merely grins, extending her palm. From seemingly nowhere, a small orb of fire materialises in her hand, which she cradles delicately like a frail blossom.
“You possess numerous fears, Jadi…” she whispers. “And that poses significant danger.” Fear and wrath induce irrationality and result in a loss of control.
The flames in her hand expand until they envelop her entire fist.
“You can inadvertently harm many individuals by allowing your fears to dominate you,” she states, the violet flame intensifying. “As you observe, I possess the ability to manipulate the fire element, yet it is exceedingly challenging to regulate.” My passions are driven by my emotions, and if I allow them to dominate me, I risk losing control.
I gaze apprehensively at the substantial flame.
“However, once I learnt to trust my wolf and resist my fears…” she clenches her fist, extinguishing the flames instantly. “I became the master of the flames.” The same idea applies to you if you wish to master your ability. It is essential to relinquish your concerns and place your trust in your wolf for guidance.
“I am uncertain if I can accomplish that,” I murmur.
“You will never ascertain his value unless you afford him an opportunity to demonstrate it,” she remarked with a smile. “Just as you pursue a bond with your partner, Jimmy desires a connection with you.”
Jimmy murmurs his disdain, stating that he considers him an imbecile.
Josie scowls at me. “You will not gain his trust by disparaging him,” she asserts firmly, while Jimmy rolls his eyes at her. “Do not exacerbate his shame, Wolf. You understand his suffering better than anyone.”
He lacks trust in me! Jimmy exclaims. I observed for years the treatment we received from Dad, and did he ever permit me to assist? No! He sent me to a corner and compelled me to witness his suffering!
I sensed the pain in his voice as he expressed his fury with a snarl.
“I… I had a low opinion of myself,” I respond. “I presumed you would not appreciate me or desire to assist, so I believed it was preferable to distance you.”
Jimmy is silent, immersed in his own exasperation. I fixate on my hands, hesitant to meet Josie’s gaze, but she unexpectedly approaches and grasps my wrists.
“I understand that it is challenging to be vulnerable when you perceive a lack of concern or attentiveness from others,” she states softly. “However, Jimmy is your counterpart and will remain steadfastly by your side, regardless of the pain you may cause him. He is an integral part of your essence.”
I tug at the rug on the floor before I ultimately address Jimmy.
I apologise. I regret locking you out. I was uncertain of an alternative course of action…. I murmur.
I also express regret, he exhales. I ought to have exerted greater effort to overcome obstacles.
“Alright… this is favorable,” Josie states with a smile. “Now collaborate to access my mind. I will lower my defences to facilitate this process—”
“How can I access your thoughts?” I enquire, glancing at Andrew, who appears disinterested in our quiet confrontation. “Whenever I intentionally invade someone’s mind, I cause them pain.”
Josie acknowledges my concerns before responding. “Consider thoughts as rivers, each flowing at varying speeds and currents, all converging towards you. However, you possess the ability to construct dams to either decelerate or entirely halt their approach. To access my mind, you merely need to allow my thoughts to surface. Erect a dam to obstruct the other streams you perceive. It is not about forcibly entering my consciousness; rather, it is about permitting the flow of connection between us. Once this connection is established, you can create smaller dams to regulate the influx of information, enabling you to concentrate on my memories or thoughts. That is the essence.”
She terminates our connection and sits calmly opposite me, shutting her eyes and bestowing her trust upon me.
Alright, we can accomplish this… I convince myself, shutting my eyes and entering the dark void of my consciousness.
Allow the sounds to cascade like a river, Jimmy urges.
I gradually lowered my defences, allowing the voices of Andrew and Josie to infiltrate my thoughts at an astonishing pace. I nearly reinstated my barriers upon hearing Jimmy’s voice.
