I remain silent and follow Ricky, my thoughts solely occupied by my companion. She proceeds silently in front of me, her movements nearly robotic as she advances towards the guest house.
Bray leans his head on my shoulder, manipulating his toy wolf. “Mother is distressed,” he confides to me. “I find that unpleasant.”
“I do not either,” I respond, observing Ricky as he passes by the door. “Ta-Ricky?” “
“I require a moment,” she announces without looking back. “Bring Bray indoors.” I will arrive shortly for lunch.
“Ricky.”
“Please, Jadi, just enter the house,” she implores, accelerating down the driveway towards the trees encircling the residence.
Pursue her; she requires our assistance, Jimmy insists, anxiously pacing.
I enter the house swiftly, finding Melina and Quinn seated at the table, partaking in lunch together.
“Take Bray,” I direct my mothers, transferring the pup to Melina and hastening towards the door.
As I rush, I inhale the crisp summer air and swiftly detect Ricky’s smell, pursuing it into the woods while a cry of despair reverberates through the trees. Adrenaline surges through my veins as I shift, my heart constricting at hearing yet another scream, this one imbued with fury and frustration.
I arrive at a clearing shortly into my run, discovering Ricky striking a tree branch against the trunk of a robust redwood tree.
“Absolutely not!” She vociferates, striking the tree with the branch. “No!” She yells once more, shattering the branch into fragments. No! Negative!She snaps, discarding the fractured branch in disgust and dropping to her knees, panting in frustration. “No…” she murmurs, weeping softly onto the floor. “I cannot assume the role of a Luna again.” “I am unable to… I am unable to… I am unable to,” she sobs, striking her fist into the forest floor. “I will inevitably fail once more…” I lack the strength to endure this once more.
I stand at the periphery of the clearing, observing silently as she expresses her fury to the trees. My defences crumble, inundated by a cascade of her memories overwhelming my mind and emotions. On numerous occasions, she confronted Aldo or his father, only to be diminished to her reproductive capacity. Numerous evenings, she devoted herself to her office, strategising events, managing expenditures, and composing proposals for investors to construct the AEP complex for her pack. She devoted herself all to her pack, yet ultimately faced rejection, demotion, and expulsion.
Ricky abruptly becomes silent as she sits up to dry her eyes.
“You trailed me,” she murmurs, my cheeks flushing at being discovered. I required a moment of solitude. I am currently in a satisfactory state.
She violently assaulted an innocent tree. Jimmy mumbles. She is unwell.
Recognising the futility of concealment, I cautiously approach her and take a seat beside her. She rests her head on my paws and shuts her eyes in fatigue.
“I’m scared,” she murmurs, burying her face in my fur. “I wasn’t a very good Luna the first time around-”
“Cease that,” Jimmy exhales, bowing his head to wipe away her tears with his tongue.
Ricky leaps, taken aback by the sound of Jimmy’s voice in her mind.
“James?” “ she gasps, looking up at my wolf as he wags his tail from side to side.
He replies by licking her tear-streaked cheeks again and lying onto his back, beckoning her to cuddle with him. She accepts the invitation, nestling beside him and twisting strands of fur in her hands. We remained silent for a minute as Ricky organised her thoughts, and I waited patiently for her to articulate them to me.
“I experienced considerable discontent as Luna,” she articulates after a prolonged silence. “My efforts appeared to lack value, and I consistently felt that I let everyone down.” I was instructed to maintain silence at pack meetings and allow Aldo to articulate all the ideas, even if they originated from me. I was instructed to consistently present myself and communicate in a specific manner, as an exemplary Luna is an individual whom others should admire and seek to emulate. Are you aware of the difficulty of restraining oneself when the overwhelming want is to shout? How hard it is to force a smile when you are told everyday by the person you love most that you are a disappointment? Experiencing internal turmoil makes it challenging to derive satisfaction from your employment, as you grapple with feelings of inadequacy regarding your ability to fulfil expectations.
She raises her head and gazes at me. “I love you… However, I fear that I may disappoint you because I am broken-”
“Halt,” I assert, as Jimmy moves aside to allow me to speak. I rise on my hind legs, ensuring that Ricky comprehends every word I articulate to her. “You are correct.” You were not an exemplary Luna. Your contribution to that pack beyond the term ‘good.’
Her eyes brim with tears as she perceives my inner voice for the first time, my words soothing her heart.
“You transcended the role of an exceptional Luna,” I whisper. “Your actions during Blood Night are characteristic of an Alpha and Aldo…. He was unworthy of you. None of them accomplished that. However, I shall not repeat the same error if I obtain the title. It would be an honor to have you as my Luna and I promise I will do everything in my power to deserve you and your strength.”
I shift back into my human form as she hides her face in her hands and weeps, wrapping my arms around my mate to shield her from anymore pain. Gently pushing her hands aside, I cradle her cheeks and kiss away the tears, wishing to alleviate her suffering with my affection.
“W-we don’t need to ma-make any decisions today,” I remind her. “W-we can ma-make this decision to-to-together later. All I desire at this moment is for you to be well.
She closes her eyes, as if committing my words to memory, and leans forward for a kiss, my lips tingling with her touch. Initially, her kiss is delicate, her lips merely brushing against mine, but her enthusiastic tongue swiftly asserts dominance and voraciously investigates my mouth. Her fingers slide up my bearded cheeks, burying themselves in my hair and pulling me closer for a deeper kiss.
