Returning to school, Lizza’s condition gradually worsened. In addition to being isolated by her classmates, she also caught a severe cold due to the dropping temperatures, making her appear even more exhausted. That day was the exam for the first class in the afternoon. Lizza struggled to finish the test paper, silently reminding herself that she had to persevere, but felt an overwhelming fatigue after the exam ended.
After the lunch break, Lizza felt a wave of dizziness but still forced herself to return to the classroom. She propped her head up with her hand, holding the test paper, trying to compare answers. However, her long hair draped over the desk led her classmates sitting behind her to mistakenly think she was lying down and slacking off. The teacher immediately instructed the students behind her to call her up, but Lizza’s emotions had already reached a breaking point due to the previous isolation and exclusion.
She detested the touches from her classmates, especially when she was feeling unwell. Turning around with a glare, she gritted her teeth and asked, “What do you want?”
Seeing this, the classmate hurriedly explained, “The teacher asked me to call you.” However, this explanation did nothing to quell Lizza’s anger; instead, it made her feel even more wronged and helpless. With her physical discomfort compounded by her emotional agitation, a surge of anger welled up inside her.
Driven by her emotions, Lizza slammed her test paper down on the desk, preparing to score it. To the teacher, however, her action appeared as misplaced anger. The teacher was immediately taken aback and scolded, “What are you doing? Are you taking your anger out on your classmates? I asked him to call you; are you dissatisfied with me?”
Lizza quickly explained, “No, I just feel unwell; I’m not taking it out on anyone.” But the teacher continued to criticize her. Lizza was so frustrated that she felt like she was about to explode, yet she repeated her explanation once more. After back and forth, the teacher decided not to waste any more time and instructed Lizza to wait outside.
“Fine, I’m leaving!” Lizza retorted angrily. Her heart was filled with injustice, and in her fury, she stormed out of the classroom. Initially, she wanted to slam the door, but then she reconsidered; facing a teacher, she ultimately extended her hand to stop the door from slamming, preventing any noise.
The corridor outside was eerily quiet, with only the sound of her heartbeat echoing in her ears. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she felt herself on the verge of losing control. She didn’t know how to face this uncommunicative situation, her mind filled with the laughter of her classmates and the reprimands of her teacher, leaving her feeling helpless and lonely. She began to question herself, wondering what had happened and why everyone was so indifferent to her.
While waiting for the teacher to come out, Lizza once again explained, “Teacher, I’m not taking it out on my classmates; I just feel unwell. I really have no other thoughts.” Her tone was firm, yearning for understanding. However, the teacher’s attitude began to grow impatient, coldly asking her, “Is it appropriate to speak to a teacher like this? Do you talk to your parents like this too?”
Lizza’s heart jolted, and she replied, “I always talk like this! You and I are both human; why should I treat you with special respect? I treat everyone the same; if you don’t believe me, you can ask my parents! And don’t use your attitude to speak when you can’t win an argument. I’ve explained to you several times; I’m not taking it out on anyone, you’re just going in circles and using my attitude against me!”
Upon hearing this, the teacher’s face showed surprise and anger, but Lizza could no longer endure it. The anger inside her led her to unintentionally engage in a debate with the teacher. She could no longer suppress her emotions, and tears began to flow uncontrollably.
Back in the classroom, she felt the strange gazes of her classmates and could no longer bear the loneliness. So, she closed her eyes, suppressing all her emotions deep inside, yet felt suffocated. Every time she wanted to cry, she swallowed her tears back, forcing herself not to be weak.
